Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Seattle: PS...the Unfortunate Incident

Remember how I said there was an H&M in downtown Seattle? Well, I had to go before we left or I would have regretted it--it had been haunting my thoughts ever since we drove past on Day 1. So as we left the Asian Art Museum, I grabbed a phenominal cup of loose leaf earl grey tea from the cafe, along with (a super rare find) a few soy-free chai flavored chocolate bars. I drank some of it on the way to H&M.

Traffic was bitch so Blake dropped me off a block away from the store, and I told him I'd be as fast as I could while he circled and got a good parking spot. The store was great--I had wanted a black v-neck sweater for daily wear and the first thing I see when I go in: a table of v-neck sweaters for $19.90. Wonderful. I grabbed some equally affordable and cute items--think European Old Navy but more sophisticated; great style, super low prices--and tried them on as fast as I could. The line was super long, and I got out of there in just under an hour. Blake was parked right out front--he'd been fending off the meter-person since our change had been tapped--so we did our final snack/diaper/nurse, and got on the freeway.

Here is where the incident happens. So I reach for my tea. Somewhere in the back of my mind I think, 'geez, it's amazingly still warm'....and 'didn't I drink more than this...?' Obviously, the voice in my head was not loud enough to actually stop and inquire about these mysteries. I take a sip.

NOT EARL GREY.

It all becomes clear to me immediately: the warm, full cup; the leaving Blake in the car with the kids for an hour downtown; his tendancy to do-what-he-has-to-do when faced with needing to urinate....

As soon as I spit it out (which is basically the moment it hits my tastebuds and I can get the lid off of the cup), Blake notices what has happened. "Oh, honey! Shit! I forgot to tell you!"

My initial reaction: to bawl. Bawl like I've been violated and betrayed. He reaches out for me and I push his hand away. "Oh, great!" He says, "I ruined the whole trip!"

I grab some juice and try to wash away the flavor (quite salty, actually.) I tear open my chocolate bar and start devouring it square by square, my tastebud equivalent to a hot shower. After I few minutes pass, I wipe away my tears and instantly, it's hilarious. Really, really hilarious. I mean, come on, I accidently drank my husband's urine when I was expecting some delicious tea. Even I could see the humor in it. The experience in pictures looks like this:







Blake was very apologetic, and tried to make me feel better in a variety of ways. The most chivalrous gesture I thought (b/c we are weird like that) is when we arrived at a gas station, and I glared at him and said "There is a garbage can over there. You can throw away your pee-tea." I continued to glare (teasingly, of course) while he brought it over to the can, looked back at me with a guilty dog face, and took a sip for himself.

"There, now are we even?" No, because he was expecting it--it was the surprise factor that was half of the upset for me!

Regardless, I don't hold grudges--and I'm sure we will be telling this story for a long, long time.

14 comments:

Sarah Elizabeth said...

Delurking (have been reading and enjoying silently since you were pregnant!) to say that you guys are the best married couple I have ever [known?] heard of!!!

I'm so sorry it happened, but it's a great story to tell. You write so well! I was reading along, shopping vicariously through you at H&M, when I got to the pee part my jaw dropped and my hand flew to my mouth in a "oh my lord I cannot believe that just happened!" movement.

Anyway, huge hugs to you and huge accolades to Blake for evening the score.

Oh, and I think he might have been dehydrated. :0)

Lee said...

Oh my gosh!! That is seriously hilarious. Awful, but hilarious. Eeeek! LOL. I have tears in the corners of my eyes from laughing. The photos that go along with it are priceless.

Aimee said...

OMG frickin' hilarious!! I laughed so loud my sleeping attached to my nipple babe woke up!!! I also agree the photos are so perfect!!

elliesmadre said...

This story is still funny the second time. The pics are great, and it's very chivalrous that he took a sip too. But...it was his own pee. lol Love the pee-tea. hehehe

MamaLou said...

Ok, I burst out laughing and then read it to my husband who also laughed....."pee-tea" awesome story!

Jennifer said...

That was seriously the funniest thing I've read in a long time. Jeff and I were cracking up. You should frame the series of photos so you can remember it forever (I'm sure you'll forget the taste eventually). XOXOXO

Jennifer said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
korin said...

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! seriously best. story. ever. Sorry for the pee-tea. hahahahaha!

Rebekah said...

I'd heard it the other night and I'm STILL cackling. He's a good sport, but YOU deserve a big, beautiful cache of amazing Earl Grey to make sure your mouth is completely cleansed and lurved on.

Oooh, or a date with me to hear Kirtan and have some Tao of Tea Earl Grey! (if I had an emoticon, it'd be the :loveeyes: one)...

mamayogalove said...

thank you for sharing that great adventure. i will let G know because she is facinated with the indian yogis who drink their morning urine... priceless.

Marketing Mama said...

1st - ewwwwwwwwwww.

2nd - did you swallow?

3rd - did he?

Love your trip pics and stories!

Mama Nomad said...

hahaaha....

1st--i know!
2nd--no, i knew right away and "aborted mission"
3rd--yes, he took a true sample. love that man.

thanks for reading.

Amy said...

So you had a taste of "Earl Grey Pee" Reggie just said, as I read the story aloud through my chokes of tears and laughter.

I'm so glad you can see the humor in it, cause it's some funny shite!

I once took a big gulp of "morning after" water full of cigarette ashes. Burns a little....

Blake is alllll man. Seriously, I don't know any other man who would do that.

And if Reggie ever proposes to me, I'm going to ask him..."But would you drink your pee for me?" DEALBREAKER! LOL

Other than that, sounds like a great score on the Seattle purchases and some fun times with the fam!

hope505 said...

~ hello ~ just stumbled over here from Mrs. G's...
I love the pictorial that goes with this post! *hahaha!* so funny!